Everything about you is perfect - your lips, your skin, your eyes, your body. Perfect! You're lucky to be born beautiful,

not like me, who was born to be a big liar.




First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly.




Marry and make a woman happy OR remain a bachelor and make several women happy!




Do you believe that getting married on a Friday brings bad luck ?
"Of course, why would Friday be an exception?"




A pregnant lady went to an astrologer.
Astrologer: When u deliver a baby, baby's father will die.
Lady: Thank god! My husband is safe!




At a party, someone yelled: All married guys plz stand next to one person who has made ur life worth living.
The bartender was almost crushed to death.




Suraj ki pahli kiran aapko Khusi de... Dusri kiran hasi de... Teesri tandurasti... Chouthi kamyabi... Bas ab aur nahi garmi

lagegi. Good Day.




Ek Gujju ka sapne mein kisi ne rape kar diya di. Next day Gujju ne apna Bank acccount band karwa diya kyon ki Bank mein

likha tha: Hum aap k Sapno ko Haqeeqat mein badal denge.




Amitabh: Mere pas Gaadi he, Banglaw hai, Bank Balance hai, tumhare paas kya hai?
Shashi: Mere paas bhi Gaadi hai, Bunglaw hai, Bank Balance hai...
Silence for few Minutes...
Amitabh: Abey to phir Maa kahana hai?




Q: What time is it when most people go to the dentist?
A: Tooth-Hurty!




Buffalo par baithe ek jaat koTRAFFIC police ne rok k puchha: Aap ka helmet kahan hai? Fine lagega.
Jaat: Re baawale, dhayan se dekh Neeche, 4 wheeler hai !




Baap: Beta maine tere liye ek ladki dekhi hai, Vo Roopvati, Gunvati, or Sarasvati hai.
Beta: Lekin papa mein kisi or se pyar karta hoon or vo.. Garbhvati hai.




Gandhigiri ki safalta ke baad, pesh hai. Messagegiri jisme aap msg kare ya na kare, ham msg bhejte rahenge, kabhi to aapko


sharm aayegi. Gud Day!




Doctor, cut off my dog's tail.
Vet: Why do u want to do that?
Coz my mom-in-law is visiting us & I don't want anything to make her think she's welcomed.




Most of my friends are normal, sane, cultured, decent, intellectual & well-behaved persons... Just wanna thank you for


breaking the monotony!