I am in seventh heaven, the other six do not want me.



Women are like hurricanes! When they come they are wet and heavy. When they leave they take your home and your car ! !



No one ever died because of hard labour, but I think :"why would I take the risk?"



I love working. I can look at it for hours.



We used to listen to the Doors, now we have Windows.



Press any key to continue or any other key to quit.



Computers are machines to help you solve problems you wouldn't have if you didn't have a computer.



Life would be a lot easier if I had the source-code.



Life is like a nose, you have to take out what is in it !



You need 60 muscles to be angry and 20 to smile why would you make things difficult?



My thoughts wondering off, I am always everywhere.



I intended to become rich while sleeping, but I could not fall asleep yet.



It is better to have one bullet in the hand than ten in the back.



Nok nok. Who's there? ..... Marie ...... Marie who? ...... Marie who wanna...!!



Wanna get stoned? Drink wet cement!



Umm...your .... ZIP is open...



Reality is for people who can't face science fiction.



Idiot (id-ee-it) n.- One who disagrees with you.



How do frogs die ? They Ker-mit suicide.



Elvis is dead and I don't feel so good myself.



I'm not as dumb as you look.



If I can be of any help, you're in worse trouble than I thought.



What do I miss about my wife? Her absence.



Sometimes I wake up grumpy. Other times I let her sleep.



Linus is like a wigwam,no windows,no gates and an apache inside...



Q: Why is a racist like a drunk?
A: Cos whatever they say ends in a slur.



Q: What's the difference between a racist's house and a porcupine?
A: With the porcupine, the pricks are on the outside.