Love is a name, Sex is a game. Forget the name and lets play that game!



Roses are red, Pickles are green, I like ur legs and all that's between!



I like your style, you got sheer class, but babe, my god, I WANT YOUR ASS!



Hey, there is Hot-sex, Group-sex, safe-sex, phone-sex, speedy-sex, crazy-sex and for people wid ur face - NO SEX!



When an apple is green, it's ready to pluck, When a girl is sixteen she's ready to ..WOOPS...wrong number....



U good at math? Well, add a bed, subtract ur cloths, divide ur legs and we can multiply!



Yes, this is my pickup. No, I will not help you move.



Sorry, I don't date outside my species.



Important Message: Conserve your toilet paper - use both sides.



I've got the ship, you've got the harbor ... what say we tie up for the night?

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.

I might be in the basement. I'll go upstairs and check.



The secret to success is knowing who to blame for your failures.



There are no personal problems which cannot be solved through suitable application of high explosives.



Just because you're smart does not mean that the other guy is stupid.



You may be recognized soon. Hide.



Please, Lord, let me prove that winning the lottery won't spoil me.



He who laughs last thinks slowest.



Mercedes Benz : A mechanical device that increases sexual arousal in women.



I pretend to work here - they pretend to pay me.



Is somebody not editing what I'm saying here???



Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.



If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.



You worry too much about your job. Stop it. You are not paid enough to worry.



Gorgeous, intelligent, kind, sweet, charming, witty, hilarious, friendly...well enough about ME! How are you?



My mom never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch



If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me



Mind intentionally left blank...



I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.



Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.



Nostalgia ain't what it used to be.



If I want your opinion, I'll give it to you.



Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time - I think I've forgotten this before.



If practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, why practice?



The best way to a man's heart is to saw his breast plate open.



It was an accident officer. I was cleaning my fingernails. With ahunting knife. And he ran into me. Backwards. 17 times.



Born Free........Taxed to Death.



We will now upgrade your brain, please wait...searching...searching...still searching...sorry NO BRAIN found